Seeing is believing...

Picture courtesy of reviewscentral.com

It was a Thursday, I am sure it was a Thursday, I don't know why I remember the day detail, a Thursday in 2001, October maybe? Sometime after the school year started.

I was in high school, I was a good student, and I loved mathematics, I didn't mind other subjects, but I took studying way too seriously not to be emotional about it, now B"H I try my best to channel those emotions to the holy subjects I learn in morning seminary, to Torah and Avodas HaShem.

Here I am telling you something from the past.

I was in class, math class, I should explain to you that when I say math, I mean any mathematical subject besides geometry, that is the vocabulary used in the high school I went to.

So let's get back to subject, I was in math class.

I sat, taking notes, trying to understand Mrs Tafta, the math professor, she was one of my favorites, all math professors were my favorites.

She was trying to explain...infinity.

Everyone was taking notes, listening, or actually hearing.

I took studying too seriously, so I was serious about understanding this class too.

Mrs Tafta started drawing the graph of the y line in y=1/x, and as I see the lines spreading apart, I got upset, and then angry, and then insulted...then I couldn't hold my tears.

I stopped taking notes, Mrs Tafta didn't notice, I always sat in the back of the classroom, I understood the theory, I understood that the lines she draw would never ever touch the x=0 and y=0 lines.... but I wasn't detached, and I couldn't just take the notes, go home, study and wake up the next day as if nothing happened.

After the class I run to Mrs Tafta crying, she couldn't understand my confusion, I had a 100 on the previous test, why would this be so different, what is she worried about she probably wondered.

I understood, I told her, but I wish I have never learned this, now I have to stop and rethink my value system, the one that didn't have any space for any possibilities other than the ones proven, and infinity wasn't one of them...until now.

I was upset because I couldn't pretend to be arrogant anymore, now the equation is there, and the y line that Mrs Tafta draw, will never get any closer to the horizontal x line.

And that was my first glimpse at infinity, at G-d.

Two lines and exactly two curves, that is all it took to make me realise how stupid I was to ignore that there is something beyond my understanding. To pretend that I knew, when internally I didn't know, but pretending was easier than admitting my humility.

A math lesson, an equation: y=1/x, a blackboard (which was actually green) and Mrs Tafta, the math teacher is what it took to give me purpose, once again.

Picture courtesy of YorkU.